Befriending your Children

Some parents today don’t want to get too close to their children because they fear that their children will not respect them if there is a lot of familiarity between them and their children. Such parents assume that their children will take their friendship for granted and to turn the friendship to their advantage.

Whereas children can be funny in how cleverly they try to manipulate their parents, it that doesn’t mean that you should build walls between you and your children. It is wrong to have a situation where your children are even scared to come close to you because they feel that would shout at or scold them for talking to you.

One of the reasons for many modern social problems in families can be related to poverty, stress or unhappiness. But the most crucial factor that leads to misunderstanding and problems between family members is the absence of friendships within families. Many parents and societies in general ignore this fact.

Friendship is one of the most important relationships in a family. If you look at a family where there are always problems among family members, you’ll notice that there are no bonds of friendship among the warring members.

Parent-child relationships should transcend the making of rules (in the part of the parents) and following such rules (on the part of the child). It is also not limited to buying children the latest phones that comes into market or showering them with expensive gifts. It is about sitting down and communicating with your children. You cannot expect to know what your children have in mind if you are not open to them or if you make yourself a monster in their eyes. Sometimes a child smiles with you while hiding the fact that she is dying because of loneliness.

There are some things that parents cannot understand about the happenings in their children’s lives except when they are close to them. Being friends with your children give them a shoulder to lean on when the need arises.

For example, you can have a child who is bullied a lot in school. If you are a distant parent, the child might not be comfortable telling you her woes. However, if you are close with the child, he will be comfortable sharing her worries with you. Being a good listener to your children will only make you a better parent and help you find solutions to what they go through.

As good parents, try by all means to know your children, even if it requires being their closest and best friend.

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